Once
upon a time in the woods outside Peterhead, there lived a loverly little badger. His name was "black mess with tipex down
face". One day he bought a red balloon, but, as suddenly as an Irishman gets drunk at a funeral, wedding, party, or weekday,
a gust of wind blew it deep into the evil forest. Oh no! Cried black mess with tipex down face. He went into the woods to
find his balloon, as you do. He found his friend "bald fucking frog" who had his tongue up one of his many bitches ass. Black
mess with tipex down face asked bald fucking frog if he had seen the balloon. No black mess with tipex down face no I
havent seen it but I do I will bum it into next week. Oh, thank you bald fucking frog I shall go deeper into the woods to
find my balloon. He hated that fucking frog. Black mess with tipex down face went deeper into the forest and came upon his
friend "sally the slutty Rachael" who was sucking on 40 horses willies. Have you seen my red balloon? no I have been to busy
as you can see I have lots of work to do so would u give me a hand said sally the slutty Rachael oh yes I would love to help
you said black mess with tipex down face. So after 6 hours and half a mile of horse willy flesh later, they were finished.
So he knew she hadnt seen his balloon so
black mess went deeper and deeper into the evil woods. he was so scared because sally slutty rachael
was still attatched to his own penis he hurried out into an open area there he found the duke of herrington other weise known
as the squirl. he used his tail as toilet paper and a vibrator and anything else you could imagine like a sex stick of crap.
back to the point of this rather pointless story that only one of the gingers could come up with, black mess with tipex down
face walked up to the duke after repeatedly beating sally slutty rachael as we all would love to do almost to death but not
quite coz we need to have her as a vegitable not as an edible thing but as a pointless waste of space oh wait she is anyway.
ah yes black mess with tipex down face was now rerally pissed of because he hadnt found his red balloon so he walked
up to the duke and said oy u seen my red balloon min coz im like hard and fucking fuckin fuck so dinna mess wee mee yi bam
(as he is from Peterhead). nit said the duke so fuck off yi bam im needin ma body kit for ma fiat punto coz im like hard min
so fuck off. so he did just then black mess with tipex down face caught a glipms of his red balloon. He saw his precious floating
just more than half a Gary Coleman above the Ground. He could reach. He knew he could. He stretched out his little black paw
for his gorgeous balloon, and then thought to his absolute horror, "bugger me timbers, I've got no opposable thumb!". He sat,
wallowing in his own "self-pity" and watched his precious float away with no way to get it back. Then he realised, he was
carrying it before! How did he manage that?! He looked down at his little badgery arm, and saw it. The Badger Balloon Holder
3000(tm)!! He search was back on! Bald fucking frog didnt have it sally the slutty Rachael she didnt have it either.
where could it be? thought black mess with tipex down face. Just then, he caught a glimpse of his balloon. He hurried after
it like an Israeli hurries to get off the bus, but he ran onto the road and was run over by a golf tdi so that was the end
of that.
This
loverly story was written by Big G
