Prologue:
Two corpsi, both alike in decomposity,
In modern Italy where we lay our scene,
From ancient loins of whorely generosity,
where std's make groins unclean.
From these two ancient enemies came,
a pair of lovers who seemed to die in part one,
but i decided that ending was utterly lame,
And i'm updating rodge, giving him a gun.
You can't be cool these days without packing heat,
though Rodge the kiddy-fiddler is far from cool,
Its disturbing where he stuck his meat,
Making a child handle his tool.
So if you read this fable to the end,
You'll see the truth of Rodge, and his excessively young friend.
Act One, Scene One
Rodge: I am utterly perplexed, is't no longer the past?
Caretaker: Fuck off you tosser, you've got corpse juice all over me fucking stairs.
Rodge: My sincerest apologies fair keeper of stairs,
i do love thee more than thou cans't devise,
and thy stairs, an expansion of thine cleaning responsibilities,
bring shame to my soul for the injury i have caused thee.
Caretaker: shut up you faggot. Get back in that tomb you stupid corpse. They take it out of my wages if any of the bodies
go missin'
Rodge: I beseech thee sir, I am not dead
Caretaker: You fucking were this morning, so just get back in.
Rodge: But Sir, i do be.....
Caretaker:
Look mate, what the hell am i going to tell management? Oh i'm sorry one of the bodies just fucked off in the middle of the
night!? Stay there 'till morning, then you can talk to the boss.
Rodge: Amen, i shall hence to my tomb.
And in the morrow talk'st to t'manager
Caretaker: Aye right fuck off you troublemaking tosser.
[Rodge returns to his tomb alone]
Rodge: Ah fair Juliet, thine corpse smells,
of the most beautiful flower,
which hath been bathed in most beautiful manure.
What's that thou say'st?
thou want'st me to mount you as a dog mounts his bitch?
Juliet thou art filthy, both in mind and body,
and even despite that Judicial writ,
thats the way, a-ha a-ha, Rodge likes it!
[Rodge "Does the Dirty" on Jodge, then goes to sleep]
Scene 2
[cockney pub, two guys talking loudly]
Frankie: Yeah i hear you Jimmy, but i say the data protection act was introduced to serve a greater purpose!
Jimmy: You, mate, are a fucking nutter. How can you talk about freedom of civil liberties while you support that kind
of legislature?
Frankie: D'you want to take this outside you fucking orlyx?
Jimmy: You fucking bet I do
[They fight to the death]
Jimmy: That takes care of him. Now off home to see my daughter Juliet, aka Jodge, whom i named after a character in that
Movie i saw, Jodge's Adventures in no Underpants.
Scene 3
Rodge: Ah, glorious morrow,
the sun doth illuminate the sky,
as a doctors duracell powered mini-maglite
doth lighten even the darkest crevice.
What say'st thou my love,
Dost' thine beauteous body
chance the morning sun?
Juliet? art thou awakened?
Juliet? Juliet!!
Oh my heart, my soul,
thou hast died with my fair Juliet.
That explains why thou movest little
whilst I took thine flower.
[enter caretaker]
Caretaker: Oi! Put some fucking pants on! the manangers coming up to speak to you.
[enter manager]
Manager: Now then. Whats all this about you being alive?
Rodge: As I hath told thine keeper of stair,
my heart once more beats in my chest
and mine eyes doth drink the fair sunlight of 'morn.
Manager: You want to do what?!
Rodge: I fear thou hast misunderstood.
Manager: No I will not get you meths! Bobby, have you been letting vagrants sleep in the tomb again?
Caretaker: No he was corpse number 174, then he just got up and started oozing on me stairs. That ooze isn't easy to
clean up you know. I reckon we should make him help. I've been saying for years....
Manager: Alrigh Bob, shut up. Take him out in the pick up and throw him in the skip.
Rodge: Sir, i do beg thee...
Manager: How dare you!? I'm not a rent boy!
Caretaker: Oh right thats it! Get in my fucking truck right now
------Incomplete Genius------------
Stick with it and it shall be finished soon.
